Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Double Take

I saw a movie the other day - 13 going on 30 - and apart from liking the movie (chick-flick timepass) I also loved something a character said.

When asked by her daughter if she would like to change anything she did wrong she says
I know I made a lot of mistakes...but I don't regret making any of them. Because if I hadn't have made them, I wouldn't have learned how to make things right.

I've made so many mistakes in my life.. things I regret so much.. things I look back upon and wish I could have done differently.. In fact if I made a list it would probably run into pages and pages..

I regret I didn't fight to save some friendships, I regret I was so difficult to approach, I regret I didn't try hard enough, I regret I settled and compromised, I regret I avoided a problem instead of tackling it head on, I regret some friends I made and I regret some friends I didn't make, I regret I didn't hang in there, I regret I failed, I regret the choices I made, I regret I was talked into something I didn't feel was right, I regret being party to a lynch-mob, I regret not making time for something I believe in, I regret wasting so much time..

But what I perhaps regret the most is not doing what the smart lady in the movie did.. not making things right.. I've tried but I don't think I've tried enough.. I think its worse making a mistake when you realise later that you didn't fix it and no amount of justification (I didn't have time, they didn't listen, they wouldnt have believed me anyway, I can't act that way) makes it better..

So I think I'm going to go with something else I found..
Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience.


  1. Mulling over yesterday or what happened 10 years ago (maybe)takes away so much of the present. As you say, we learn something from our experiences - good or bad. But when will I learn to let go!!

  2. "Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience."
    I think if we can live by it, it's great. But it's hard not to regret what we did in the past, IMO. I did something unthinkable to a friend and I regret it very much now. I keep hoping one day I would meet that friend againg and set things right. But may be regret is a good thing... it prevents us from committing the same mistake again.

    Good post :)

  3. Nuthing teaches you better than your own experience, that is why I think we do things we know are bad, but we realize the things are bad when we are affected by it.

    Great post!